PARENTS: The Father's Blessing: Part 1

Welcome to Badge of Honor-Family Ministries and Presentations. Today, I’m going to be talking about the importance of a Father’s Blessing.

Purpose of a Father

But before I do, I want to start with a question, “What is the purpose of a father?” The purpose of a father is to make deposits of love, security, affirmation & instruction into the hearts of their sons and/or daughters. By doing that, those deposits can grow like a savings account with interest and the child grows with a sense of security and confidence in their lives. It’s through a father’s positive words and actions that can bless his children which you will see later, is quite powerful.

Not a Momma Hater

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a momma hater. You’ve heard the Yo momma jokes -‘Yo momma’s so fat that when God said, “Let there be light,” God asked yo momma to move out of the way.’ Bad joke! Bad, bad joke! Not good. Not honorable. We need our moms as much as we need dads. It’s like air and water. Both are essential to our lives and the lives of our children.

Like I said, a father making positive deposits in the lives of kids is like having a savings account in a local bank.

How many of you have a savings account? You put money into it to build up or save money for when we need it later, right? We earn interest on the money that we have saved in the account. It feels good to build up our bank account so that we have some extra cash, big bucks, moola, greenbacks, or dough on hand!

We can also use it to make a withdrawal from time to time when we need a little extra cash to spend on something we need. Now we can’t withdraw more money than we have in our account or what will the bank do? Right, they’ll penalize us for it! And we would have to pay a penalty fee, right?

The same is true with the father. When he makes a deposit into their child’s life with prayer, positive words and actions, it’s just like a savings account, except he’s building up the child’s emotional savings account. This makes the child feel good. It gives them confidence and they feel valued. The child feels like they could take on the world. I hope this is making sense.

Unfortunately, sometimes a dad may have to discipline the child because they did something that they shouldn’t have done. So he has to make a negative withdrawal from your emotional savings account. It’s part of being a parent. Our children need discipline.

Making Positive Deposits

But as parents, we always want to make sure that we make more positive deposits into our child’s emotional account than negative withdrawals. If a parent keeps making withdrawals from their child’s emotional account by telling them what they are constantly doing wrong and never telling them what they are doing right, what would happen? Right, it would deplete their emotional bank account. And just like a savings account, there is a penalty. The penalty is it makes their child feel like a piece of crap! Excuse my language. Is this making sense? I hope so. Any of you ever feel like that? I have!

When a father neglects their child. This means they don’t make any deposits or withdrawals into the lives of their children. They don’t affirm them, show love to them or build security into the lives. Their emotional bank account has nothing in it. It’s empty. This can lead to insecurity and lack of confidence. Which can lead to other problems in life which I’ll talk about later.

How many of you have had a father who has consistently prayed for you, encouraged you, supported you, or blessed you while growing up? If you have, you are very fortunate and you need to thank God for him and your dad. He’s made a lot of positive deposits in your emotional bank account.

But for some of you, when I mention the word ‘dad or father’, the image may not be a pleasant one. I know it wasn’t for me. The image, might even be a source of pain for you. You didn’t get many deposits in your emotional bank account from your dad.

First “Father’s Blessing”

Here’s the first "Father’s Blessing” ever recorded. God our Heavenly Father had just created the heavens and the earth. He had created all the animals. He created everything. But, none of it brought him the pleasure of companionship.

God longed to have communion, intimacy and relationship. So, in Genesis 1 verse 24 God said “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness. . .” Genesis1:27 says “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” So we, that’s you and me, are created in whose image? Right, God’s! That’s pretty incredible stuff when you think about it.

God created the first human, Adam, who was male by birth. And Adam became the first husband and father. Adam was created in whose image? That’s right, God’s. Genesis 2:7 says “Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.”

First Family

Then from Adam’s rib God created a helpmate for him, Eve. And Eve was also created in whose image?

So here’s the first blessing ever recorded in the Bible. It’s in Genesis 1:28. It says “God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.” Thus, the first blessing and it was given by our Heavenly Father to his children, which is for all of mankind. That’s you, that’s me, that’s everyone. From the beginning of the creation of the world, God made a huge deposit into the emotional account of all of mankind by blessing us.

Satan Hates What God Creates

And right after God blessed Adam and Eve; the first man & woman, husband and wife, father and mother; who showed up to destroy what God had created. Of course, Satan! Satan hates what God creates. And we know what happened right after that? Satan talked Adam and Eve into eating from the forbidden apple and sin entered the world.

Why is Satan so set on destroying what God just created. John 10:10 says “The thief (satan) comes only to steal and kill and destroy;” It’s part of satan’s nature. Whatever God creates, Satan hates.

Satan’s Number One Target

And guess who is Satan’s number one target? The president? Rocket Man from North Korea? Waldo? No! He’s after the male, the man, the possible husband, father and spiritual leader of the household. 1 Peter 5:8 says “Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” If you are a male, Satan has put a big bullseye on each one of your backs. It becomes even bigger when you become husbands and fathers. In other words, satan has you in his crosshairs and he wants to take you out.

Why men? Why husbands? Why dads? Why is there such a big target on men’s backs? Let me explain.

Bride & Groom

When a man and a woman fall in love they usually want to get married. The man is the groom and the woman is the bride, right? Well the Bible also refers to Jesus as a groom and the church as His bride. This means in a marriage relationship, the husband and the wife represent the relationship between Christ and the church and guess what? Satan hates what God creates. He hates both relationships.

Jesus is Groom & Church His Bride

So, when we accept Christ into our lives, it’s similar to getting married. Except, we become married to Jesus. He’s the groom and we, the church, are his bride. We join Jesus in a covenant relationship with Him. Covenant means we are bound together. Jesus’ Holy Spirit comes to lives inside you. Ephesians 5 calls this “a profound mystery.” Got it?

Covenant Relationship

Now similarly, when a man and woman give their hearts to each other in marriage, the two of them also join into a covenant relationship with each other. They too are also bound together. When they do, their relationship becomes a covenant relationship between the two of them that the Bible says no one should separate? Ephesians 5 says that the two become one. The husband represents Christ and the bride represents the church.

But remember, whatever God creates, who hates? Satan! Satan hates both relationships and will do anything to pull them apart. Satan hates the fact that you chose to follow Jesus and thus, became married to Jesus. All of you are now considered part of the church, His bride and Satan is now set on destroying your relationship with the groom, Jesus. He’s going to do everything in his power to get you to quit reading your bible, quit praying, quit going to church, and quit living your life for Christ.

Jesus Died for His Bride

And since you are created male, Satan wants to destroy you as a potential husband, father and spiritual leader. The bible says that Jesus is the head of his bride the church. It also says, that husbands are to be the head of their bride and family. And just like Jesus loves us, his bride so much that he died for her; He asks husbands to do the same for their bride and family. Because of their love for their wives and family, husbands are asked to sacrifice their lives by loving and serving them. God has given men ordained power to impact their families in a huge way.

Is that happening much these days? No! Statistics show that the divorce rate has slowly increased during the mid 1900’s to today. Did you know that approximately 50% of all marriages inside and outside of church end up in divorce these days. That shouldn’t be, especially those who go to church. It’s obvious, Satan has been on attack.

Men Ordained with Great Power

God has ordained husbands and fathers with great power as the head of the family. And like the great theologian, Spiderman once said “With great power comes great responsibility.” If satan can destroy the head of the family, he can destroy God’s church and all that it represents. And that’s what satan has been up to since the creation of the world and Adam and Eve. Get the picture?

Sometimes, when I speak to men, I like to show them the following object lesson about what happens when a dad is taken out of his child’s life. I will set up a number of live animal traps. I will discharge one with a stick just to prove they are live.

Avoiding Traps

Now I’ll ask for a teen to volunteer. I’ll have them to take off their shoes and blindfold them. I tell everyone that these traps represent the traps of life that satan has set for our children; such as anger, arrogance, envy, gluttony, greed, lust, or inactivity. Now the blindfolded young teen with no shoes represents a teen in their adolescent years with no dad for guidance.

Now if I told the young teen to start walking through the traps of life with no direction, how would it turnout? Right, they would end up with some sore toes.

Now what if I call the dad into the picture and have him say, “Let me help navigate you. I’m going to help guide you through life’s traps.” See the difference?

Stats on Fatherlessness in US

Listen to these stats on fatherlessness from the US Census Bureau. They represent young teens walking though life blindfolded and barefoot with no direction from a father.

US Census Bureau Stats on the negative effects of Fatherlessness from US Dept. of Health & Human Services.

*About 50% of all children in US end up fatherless. It’s 80-90% Urban areas.

*63% of teen Suicides are fatherless.

*71% of high school dropouts are fatherless.

*85% behavioral problems are fatherless.

*85% those sitting in prison are fatherless.

*90% of all homeless & runaway children are fatherless.

Did you know children from Fatherless homes are. . .

*5 times more likely to commit suicide

*7 times more likely to get pregnant.

*15 times more likely to have behavioral disorders

*15 times more likely to end up in prison as a teen

*24 times more likely to run away from home.

*AND 73 times more likely to end up killed

Power of Father in the Family

Now listen to these stats that show the power of the father in the family. They show how the presence of an active responsible father promotes and improves academic performance and reduces disciplinary problems among children.

*Preschoolers with actively involved fathers have stronger verbal skills.

*Children with actively involved fathers display less behavior problems in school.

*Girls with strong relationships with their fathers do better in mathematics.

*Boys with actively involved fathers tend to get better grades and perform better on achievement tests.

*A fathers’ involvement encourages children’s exploration of the world around them and confidence in their ability to solve problems.

*Highly involved fathers contribute to increased mental dexterity in children, increased empathy, less stereotyped sex role beliefs and greater self-control.

The proof is in the pudding. Can you see the power that a father holds?

If you’d like to learn more about the ‘Fathers’ Blessing’, go to ‘The Father’s Blessing: Part 2’ by clicking ‘Here’.